Abreu! 24! Derby! Cinco Tres!

Abreu! 24! Derby! Cinco Tres!

Alicia Machado must be proud.  Ortiz just choked and Abreu is in the finals against the hometown guy, Pudge Rodriguez.  I missed the first round madness because I was busy at work following the horrible ESPN home run tracker.  Scott called me periodically to tell me of the Abreu insanity.

10:54 - Any movie with Vince Vaughn is probably worth checking out.  I'm just happy Ben Stiller isn't it it.  At least I hope not.  Can you really remake Bad News Bears????!??

10:59 - Chris Berman should be shot.  Bobby steps in.. Ball One.  Ball Two.  Ball Three.  Out1.  Long Fly ball!  Nope.  Damn it Bobby, that guy wants a house!  Back Back Back Gone!  1 Hr, 2 Out.  3 Out.  Damn it!  4 outs.  Damn.  5 outs.  He is looking tired, not looking good for our Phillie.

11:02 - Chris Berman should be shot.  Bobby gets 2 quick ones!  3 homers.  Towering shot!  4 Homers.  ouch. check swing?!  Wally wants that house Bobby!  5 HR!  6!  Bobby is feelin it!  36 on the night!  36!@#!

11:05 - 7!  Gone!  8!  Why can't he do this in the 8th or 9th innings!?!?  7 outs.  Wow that was a long ball, 9 Hrs, 7 outs.  Foul.  8 outs.  Joe Morgan thinks 9 homers will be tough to beat in the finals.  He adjusted to get that barrel out in front.  Good barrel work Bobby.  10 Hrs!  Abreu gets harassed by Miguel Cabrera!  Vamos!  I think that's what he said.  41 Home runs on the night!  Jebus.  Abreu won, this is over.  That sip of Gatorade really helped.  9 outs.  10.

11:09 - Bobby finishes with 41 home runs!  "I do the best that I can do to hit a homer here.  I think this is a beautiful night."  For all the shit Philly fans give Bobby, he really seems like a class act.

11:11 - Jimmy Rollins is shown cheer-leading, good work Jroll.

11:12 - Note to self: Buy a Chevy Truck, use my MasterCard more, buy another Chevy with employee discount.

11:17 - Pudge steps in.. Ball One.  Ball Two.  GONE.  1 Hr.  Gone.  2 Hr.  Uh oh Bobby, uh Oh.  Out1.  Out 2.   Out 3.   Out.  4 outs, 2 Hrs.  5 Outs.  Bobby is starting to look good.  Big Smile on Bobby's face.  6 outs.  GONE!  4 Hrs.

11:20 - Fans are chanting for Pudge, Out 7.  Grounder to Rollins, Out 8.  Gone.  4 HRs.

11:23 - Bobby Wins!  I got lost looking up some stats.  Bobby, the second Phillie ever to compete in the HR Derby (Jim Thome 2004), wins it with a total of 41 HRs.

Hey Bobby, why don't you hustle a little more in the outfield!  Boo! AHAHH I'm just kidding, Congrats to Bobby Abreu for representing Philadelphia and hitting the cover off of the ball in Detroit.  Good work Bobby, at least Phillies fans have one thing to cheer about this baseball season.  Now lead off tomorrow's game with a solo shot!

Editor's Note: All exclamation points in this post are used for embellishment as I am deliriously tired from too much work.  (Hence the lack up solid updates lately.)

Shocker: Phillies interested in getting one of baseball's best players

Shocker: Phillies interested in getting one of baseball's best players

We're all looking forward to the free-agent class of 2018.

If Maikel Franco doesn't shape up, the Phillies could make a hard push for Manny Machado. Franco after a two-game benching is back in the lineup for this afternoon's game against the Rockies (see story).

Then, of course, there's Bryce Harper, who earlier this month agreed to a one-year, $21,625,000 deal for next season. 

And guess what? If Harper becomes a free agent after next season, the Phillies would be interested in signing him.

Really?

According to a FanRagSportsNetwork, citing a Phillies source, the Phils would be interested luring Harper to Philly.

Shocker. 

It'd be big news if a Phillies source said the team wasn't interested in signing Harper. 

Anyway, the story also quotes a National League scout.

“Could you imagine what he could do in that ballpark playing 81 games a year in that bandbox?” the scout said.

Chances are every Phillies fan has already imagined it. Harper this season alone is hitting .351/.400/.784 with five homers and 12 RBIs in nine games against the Phils. In three games at the Bank, he's hitting just .250 with a homer and two RBIs.

But in 38 career games at CBP, he's hitting .296/.361/.627 with 12 home runs and 26 RBIs.

In 89 career games against the Phillies, he's hitting .282 with 20 homers and 54 RBIs.

At the risk of stating the obvious, here's one thing to remember: If the Phils sign Harper, then he'd no longer benefit from facing them.

Today's Lineup: Franco batting cleanup as Phillies try to snap skid

Today's Lineup: Franco batting cleanup as Phillies try to snap skid

Well, this hasn't gone well. 

Coming into Thursday afternoon's game against the Rockies, the Phillies have lost five straight. They've lost nine of their last 10. They've lost 20 of their last 24. 

At 15-29, they're not just the worst team in the NL East. They're not just the worst team in the National League. 

Through 44 games, the Phillies are the worst team in baseball. 

Just to make it to a .500 record this season, they would need to go 66-52 (.559) the rest of the way. 

Their four-game series against the Rockies will mercifully come to a close on Thursday afternoon at Citizens Bank Park. In the first three games of the series -- all losses -- the Phils have been outscored 23-5. 

Maikel Franco returns to the four-hole as the Phillies try to snap out of their funk.

The Phillies on Thursday also activated right-handed pitcher Jeanmar Gomez from the disabled list. Gomez takes Adam Morgan's spot on the roster. Morgan was reassigned to Triple A Lehigh Valley after throwing three scoreless innings during the Phillies' 7-2 loss to the Rockies.

Gomez hasn't pitched since May 4 because of an elbow injury. He began the season as the Phillies' closer but was demoted after blowing two saves and allowing seven runs in his first five innings. In 11 1/3 innings this season, Gomez has a 7.94 ERA.

Here's the full lineup: 

1. Cesar Hernandez, 2B
2. Aaron Altherr, LF
3. Odubel Herrera, CF
4. Maikel Franco, 3B
5. Tommy Joseph, 1B
6. Michael Saunders, RF
7. Cameron Rupp, C
8. Freddy Galvis, SS
9. Vince Velasquez, P