Dikembe Mutombo and This Talking Bear Are Going to Save You from the End of the Mayan Calendar

Dikembe Mutombo and This Talking Bear Are Going to Save You from the End of the Mayan Calendar

That's it. Old Spice wins the internet for the rest of the year. Or at least until the end of the world ... whichever comes first.

Old Spice has launched the online game, "Dikembe Mutombo's 4 1/2 Weeks to Save the World," offering this description, as narrated by Dikembe himself, in its introduction:

"A kabillion some odd years ago-ish, the Mayans predicted the world will end on December 21, 2012, which is a terrible idea since we as humans have not even invented a self-combing hair yet.

"Someone had to defend our planet and prevent this from happening. And that defender had to be me: Dikembe Mutumbo.

"For 4 1/2 weeks, I will courageously battle to save our world and, with your help, carve additional time into the Mayan calendar to buy us more time on the earth. That's why this game is called: "Dikembe Mutombo's 4 1/2 Weeks to Save the World."

For audio of that narration and the game's theme song, listen below (Of particular note is when he starts playing a flute-like instrument at the 1:10 mark. He's supporting that flute with his third hand in the picture above while holding two doves in his left and right hands):

Each week leading up to Dec. 21, a new playable level is unlocked, through which you and Mutumbo can help save the world.

Week 1 features Dikembe's attempt to save us from a new South Korean dance craze, which according to the talking bear featured below, "...is well past its natural social buzz shelf life." If Dikembe cannot save us, the bear forewarns, "It will be the end of the world." Why Dikembe is holding a duck goes unexplained.

The bear, by the way, is named "Science the Bear," and when Dikembe asks him if he's right about the near-imminent apocalypse, he responds that he's "hyper-intelligent bear with a keen fashion sense and firm grasp of the English langauge," so, "of course, [he's] right."

Good enough for us.

Week 2 features Thanksgiving with Science and "random turkey."

Basically, stop wasting time and go waste some time by heading immediately over to OldSpiceSavesTheWorld.com to play through Weeks 1 and 2 with Dikembe and Science ... the bear.

UPDATE: Uh, we just realized we can actually embed the game. Play it here:

Union emotional after Maurice Edu's season-ending injury

Union emotional after Maurice Edu's season-ending injury

CHESTER, Pa. — On the eve of his comeback after missing nearly 13 months with a left tibia stress fracture and other related injuries, Union midfielder Maurice Edu fractured his left fibula on Saturday, keeping him out for the 2016 playoffs and beyond.

“I was trying to take the shot on goal and my foot got stuck in the turf,” Edu said Sunday, in his blue Union-issued suit and supported by crutches. “My ankle rolled and twisted and it kind of snapped a little bit. I heard it crack, and a lot of pain from there. I got a scan afterward, and there was a break.”

There's no timetable his return.

Edu, 30, has spent over a calendar year fighting various injuries that have kept him out of game action. His trouble began on Sept. 30, 2015, when he played through the U.S. Open Cup final with a partially torn groin and sports hernia. It was during Edu’s recovery from those injuries that he developed a stress fracture.

"A little bit frustration. A lot of frustration, to be honest," he said. "But all I can do now is get back to work, focus on the positives and make sure that my situation isn’t a distraction from the team."

Edu’s teammates were equally devastated by the news. Edu, the Union captain when healthy, is popular and well-respected in the locker room.

"I feel so bad for him," said Alejandro Bedoya, who wore a dedication to Edu under his jersey on Sunday. "He’s one of my good friends, so I was looking forward to playing alongside him. I know how hard he’s worked to get back, and to see him go out like that, it’s heartbreaking. I’m sad for his loss and I hope he stays strong."

Edu, who has been with the Union since 2014, returned to training in July and played three conditioning appearances with the Union’s USL team, Bethlehem Steel FC. He was on the bench for the Union’s last three games and was set to make his first appearance in over a year against the New York Red Bulls on Sunday, a game the Union eventually lost, 2-0 (see game story).

"We’re gutted for Mo," Union manager Jim Curtin said. "He was slated to start today. It’s real upsetting because he’s worked so hard to get back on the field. It’s been a tough 2016 for him, but I know he’ll come back stronger."

While he was visibly shaken by recent injury, Edu is driven to return.

"What happened, happened," Edu said. "I have no control over that. The only thing I do have control over is my next steps from here, how I prepare myself mentally and emotionally and how I continue to support this group."

Temple picked to finish 6th in AAC preseason poll

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Temple picked to finish 6th in AAC preseason poll

This is starting to become a trend. One Temple hopes to continue to prove wrong.

For the third straight year, Temple was chosen to finish sixth in the American Athletic Conference preseason poll. The poll, which was released on Monday, is voted on by the conference's head coaches.

Also selected to finish sixth last season, the Owls posted a 21-12 overall record and a 14-4 mark in the AAC to reach the NCAA Tournament. In 2014-15, TU tied for third in the AAC with a 13-5 record and was one of the last teams left out of the Big Dance.

Cincinnati was tabbed to win the American title in the poll, just ahead of UConn.

Temple, who returns three starters from last season's team, opens the 2016-17 campaign against city rival La Salle at the Liacouras Center on Nov. 11.