NSFWFC: Sixers Line Up for the Heat in Season Home Opener

NSFWFC: Sixers Line Up for the Heat in Season Home Opener

Poor, poor Michael Carter-Williams. It was already gonna be a struggle for him in his NBA debut--the 22-year-old rookie has game, we think, but it's gonna take a minute for it to translate on this level--but premiering against the Miami Heat, he might try to re-declare for his senior season at Syracuse before the night's over. The blitzing perimeter D of Mario Chalmers and Norris Cole (and the hard-trapping help D from their forwards and bigs) brought Linsanity to an end, and ruined Derrick Rose's first game back from ACL surgery last night in Miami, holding the former MVP to just 12 points on 4-15 shooting. Against MCW...there will be tears, for sure.

Of course, that's not to say that the rest of the Sixers' lineup will have it that much easier--Evan Turner has had some nice games against the Heat (including his own debut game, on opening night three seasons ago), but the Liberty Ballers have still won just one of their last 20 against the Heat, and even that one took a miracle three from Lou Williams--you remember the one.

No, the Sixers are not gonna have an easy one tonight, though they will be getting a couple breaks in this one--not only are the Heat on the second to night of a back-to-back after an emotional, hard-fought season opener against Chicago, but they'll be without All-NBA guard Dwyane Wade--though really, all that means is that the Heat will be able to spread the floor better with Ray Allen or James Jones in his stead and let LeBron really pick the Sixers apart. One or two breaks isn't nearly enough to make up the gap in quality between these two teams.

All we can really hope for tonight is for early contention and late survival. If the Sixers can at least keep it close for a quarter or two, get nice performances from Evan and Thaddeus Young, and get MCW the hell out of there before the scarring becomes permanent, then that'll have to count as the moral victory for the evening. Not much, but ti's all we're gonna have for at least our first couple games and possibly a lot longer, so get used to it.

Adding insult to injury (and more insult) tonight is that in Cleveland, it appears that our old friend Andrew Bynum will be bucking the odds and actually playing in the Cavs' season opener (supposedly). Bynum has been cleared for game action, though he will not start, and nobody really has much of a clue what he'll look like out on the court. While I don't necessarily wish eternal misery upon the Bynum household, I'm not gonna deny that I'ma be a little salty if he just straight up plays for this Cleveland team and, like, doesn't miss pretty much the entire season for no real reason. Harumph.

Whatever. We have Sixers basketball, real (mostly) professional basketball, and that's enough excitement in itself for me tonight. Get ready for the big ride tonight, guys, and if you are not sufficiently pumped, get yourself there with our 2013-14 Sixers Official Spotify Playlist. Go Ballers.

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There aren't enough Chooch pillows for every Philadelphian

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There aren't enough Chooch pillows for every Philadelphian

Carlos Ruiz has been traded to the Dodgers and it is sad.

Not in the sense that it's a move that remotely affects anything about the current state of the Phillies. It's sad simply because Chooch -- lovable and awesome and wonderful Chooch -- is no longer a Phillie.

Chooch will be remembered for catching Roy Halladay's perfect game and no hitter and that little dribbler down the line in Game 3 of the 2008 World Series. And, of course, dropping to his knees in celebration with Brad Lidge making them World Effin Champions.

But mostly he'll just be missed. What a guy to have aroud for so long.

Roy knows how hard it is not to have him around. I guess Chase won't need his any longer since the two will be reunined with one last chance of glory in L.A.

Phillies trade Carlos Ruiz to Dodgers

Phillies trade Carlos Ruiz to Dodgers

Jimmy Rollins. Then Chase Utley. Now Carlos Ruiz.

Thursday closed another chapter of the Phillies' golden era.

Ruiz, the Phillies' catcher since 2006, has been traded to the Dodgers (along with cash) for catcher A.J. Ellis, right-hander Tommy Bergjans and a player to be named later.

Rollins was dealt to the Dodgers in December 2014. Utley, still with Los Angeles, was traded to the Dodgers in August 2015.

Ryan Howard is now the lone leftover from the Phillies' 2008 world champion club.

In 11 big-league seasons — all with the Phillies — Ruiz has hit .266 with a .352 on-base percentage and has been lauded for his game-calling abilities. This season, the 37-year-old is batting .261 with a .368 OBP, three home runs and 12 RBIs in a reserve role.

"I met Chooch in 2009 for the first time and immediately sensed that he was a special player," Phillies manager Pete Mackanin said. "But more importantly, over the years I grew to know that he is a special person. I'll miss him."

Ruiz caught Cole Hamels' no-hitter in July of last season, marking the catcher's fourth no-no behind the plate, tying him for most in MLB history with Jason Varitek.

"He’s a tremendous catcher and it just shows," Hamels said after no-hitting the Cubs at Wrigley Field on July 25. "If he wasn’t, he wouldn’t be catching this many no-hitter, perfect games. All of us have been fortunate enough to have him."

The Panama native, beloved and known by the Delaware Valley as "Chooch," quickly became a fan favorite. He was the staple behind home plate of the team's five-year run from 2007-11, in which it won five National League East titles, two NL pennants and, of course, the World Series championship in 2008.

"They are my favorite fans in the world," Ruiz said in February, "and we have some good memories together."

Philly Mayor goes to bat for Eagles fans, cheesesteaks against John Oliver

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HBO's Last Week Tonight

Philly Mayor goes to bat for Eagles fans, cheesesteaks against John Oliver

Charter schools. They're complicated!

After watching John Oliver's segment on them over the weekend, you'd agree there is plenty of nuance involved in the charter school debate. But also that some of them are dirty as all get out. An underground nightclub at a SCHOOL? Jeez. That can't be okay anywhere.

It's a solid segment. But it also took a couple of unneeded digs at the city of Philadelphia, its cuisine, and its sports fans.

That irked the Mayor of Philadelphia and he fought back today on Twitter.

"Agree on charter oversight but English soccer fan who eats fish from newsprint can't judge Eagles fans, cheesesteaks," Jim Kenney tweeted.

Take that you fish-eating Brit!

You can also watch the entire John Oliver segment from Last Week Tonight below.