The Evster Catches You Up on the NBA Finals

The Evster Catches You Up on the NBA Finals

Look, I like Carlos Zambrano. I think he's a very interesting fella and I thoroughly enjoyed watching him pummel those Gatorade coolers. I also like Zac MacMath. When I went to see the Union play Real Madrid last summer, I walked into the Linc right behind his entire family who were all wearing MacMath jerseys. Nice folks. Cute family. Mediocre goalie, but still. Also the name MacMath is fun to say. MacMath. MacMath. So I get it, I really do. This is a Philadelphia sports website and the 700 Level followers want to read about Philadelphia sports, and that's fine, Jonathan Papps blew another save, we should talk about it. He stinks, there I talked about it, BUT THERE IS AN AMAZING NBA FINALS GOING ON RIGHT NOW WITH A GAME 7 ON TAP TONIGHT, and I'm pretty sure, after doing extensive research, that there has not been one stinking post about the Finals on this website! And correct me if I'm wrong, but this is all coming at a time when EVERY PHILADELPHIA TEAM SUCKS BUTT.

So seeing as tonight is Game 7, and I'm the only person in this city who apparently realizes that MICHAEL YOUNG DOESNT MATTER, let's recap what's been going on in THA FINALZ!!!

Game 1: Tha Shot

Forget about the fact that Tony Parker FELL DOWN just seconds before the shot, then pulled a Curly Neal routine, twisted and turned and ducked under LEBRONNY-BRON of all people before hitting the game winner, there has never, ever, ever been a shot in NBA history that was so close to being a shot clock violation, yet so clearly was not. Each time they showed that Tony Parker replay it seemed to hit home just how incredibly close it was, and how lucky Tony is to have such iddy biddy little French fingers. Parker was so unbelievable in Game 1 (21pts, 6assts 0turns), that you almost (keyword: almost) forgot about the fact that he totally had sex with his best friend's wife. Ugh, what a dick. Really cute guy, sexy accent, but still a dick.

Other things we should've blogged about: LeBronski had a triple dubb (but was held under 20pts), Danny Green wapped four 3s, Birdman outscored Matt Bonner 7 to 0, T-Mac DNP.

Final Verdict: The Heat were tired, Kawhi Leonard is better than everyone on the Sixers, and there's no way I can root for a dude who boned his best friend's wife.

Game 2: Tha Block

Honestly shocked that Tiago Splitter has continued to suit up and attempt to play basketball since his dunk attempt was rejected by the Lebrontasaurus Burger. I really felt like after that play, Splitter should've just ran off the court and out of the arena, never to be heard from again. Kinda like how Shawn Bradley has fallen off the face of the earth since retiring. That's probably the only smart thing Shawn Bradley has ever done in his whole stupid life. God I hate that man. He's probably a really, really nice person.

Other things we should've blogged about: Just the five more 3s from Danny Green, Birdman outscored Bonner  9 to 5, TMac played 8 minutes and only attempted 1 shot. Read that again. Tracy McGrady. Eight minutes of playing time. One shot.

Final Verdict: The Heat got this in 5, Tiago Splitter probably has enough money saved up for retirement, it's absolutely mind-boggling that NBATV makes Brent Barry analyze games involving a guy who slept with his wife.

Game 3: Tha Bomb Squad

Before Game 3, I had never really understood the fascination with the 3-ball. Don't get me wrong, I liked Dale Ellis, thought Hersey Hawkins was a serviceable 10th man for the 1996 Hornets, but have always preferred a hard-nosed guy to lower his shoulder, knock people out the way and get to the rack. I also think Rumeal Robinson was the best point guard ever and my fantasy basketball team has finished in last place three consecutive years. But after watching Danny Green and Gary Neal go ABSOLUTELY BONKERS in game 3 (hitting 13 combined triples), I now get it, I totally totally totally get it. Watching them rain threes was mesmerizing, but not nearly as mesmerizing as Spike Albrecht's performance in this year's NCAA Final. I don't understand why we're still not talking about that. Did you see that little guy? So nifty! Also, how 'bout the fact that Miguel Cabrera won the Triple Crown last year?!?!? Do you realize how amazing that was?!?! I'd been waiting my whole life for that! Carl Yastrzemski can suck a butt!

Other things we should've blogged about: Lebron was held to 15pts on 7-21 shooting because Kawhi Leonard is AWESOME, Birdman and Bonner both scored 2pts, TMac had 3assts and 0turns in 7mins of action, Spike Albrecht tweeted about a thunderstorm in Michigan -- with emoticons!

Final Verdict: The Heat might be in trouble, I shoulda practiced my jumper more, I'm totally writing 30,000 words about Spike Albrecht's Twitter account next week.

Game 4: Tha Return of D-Wade

There are times when Dwayne Wade plays basketball like my 7-yr-old nephew. Dribble dribble dribble, tries to look cool, loses dribble off his foot, gathers dribble, rubs hand on his shorts as if they're sweaty and that's why he lost his dribble, hesitation move, double hesitation move, drives baseline, jumps in the air, looks around for someone to pass to, anyone, has no idea what he's doing, throws the ball wildly back toward three point line, turnover, jogs back on D as if that's a totally normal thing to do, complains to someone, wears stupid pants ... and there are other times when Dwayne Wade absolutely dominates. That was Game 4, where he (32pts), Bronkey (33) and Boshy (20) combined for 85 big ones. I don't know how the Heat ever lose a game.

Other things we should've blogged about: Three more 3s from Danny Green, Chris Bosh introduced himself to the paint ("Hi Paint, I'm Chris." "Hi Chris, I'm the Paint, I can talk,", Spo gave Mike Miller the start, Birdman DNP, TMac DNP, Bonner 4pts on 2 for 2 shooting.

The Final Verdict: Heat in 6, Mike Miller is the weirdest looking person ever, GET BONNER MORE PLAYING TIME.

Game 5: Tha Bald Spot

Pop inserts Manu into the starting lineup and Ginobili goes bonks. Driving to the hoop, jumping off the wrong foot, right hand, left hand, floaters, lookin' like a young Spike Albrecht. Oh, and just the six 3s for Danny Green.

Other things we should've blogged about: Mario Chalmers clearly has no idea who's on his team as he continues to jack up shots (2-10FG), another DNP for Birdman AND TMac, while Bonner gets one minute of action AND A STEAL. Obvs!

The Final Verdict: Heat gotta win two straight at home (THERE'S NO WAY), Manu signs on with CBS for a new sitcom called "Everybody Loves Manu", Brent Barry on suicide watch.

Game 6: Tha Greatest Game Everrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Ridic comeback by the Heat (down 5 with :20 left), but how 'bout being down 11 with 7 minutes left? And with Wade on the bench, Bronislav went into beast mode, revving up the energy on D, forcing turnovers, going to the rack SANS HEADBAND, and all of the sudden the Heat were back in this ... BUT THEN TONY PARKER TOOK OVER ... and the Heat were done ... but then Ray Allen got free! ... but he didn't  really get free, he just kinda got free! ... and then overtime! ... and the return of Birdman! ... and how about Mike Miller with one-shoe? ... I can't believe how much I love three-pointers! ... They give you an extra point! ... Aghghghhh, Game 7!!!

Other things we should've blogged about: Duncan goes for 30 and 17 (but only 5pts in the second half!), Manu being Manu completely out of control, Dwayne Wade might stink, Danny Green with only one 3??? Bonner's beard is getting long!

The Final Verdict: How can you ever leave Ray Allen?!?!?!?!?

Game 7: ????

Absolutely no idea what's gonna happen tonight. It always seems like when the Heat play D, they're in it, if they try to act cool, the Spurs wap threes in their face. Honestly after his Game 6 performance, I think Dwayne Wade absolutely stinks and should just get out of Lebron's way. I obviously don't really think that, but I sorta think that. All in all, this has been an incredible Finals even though we've only had two close games. Frankly I want to root for the Spurs, but the guy slept with his teammate's wife for cryin' out loud. How can you do that? Not even Carlos Zambrano would do that!

Zac MacMath on the other hand???

Gingers are VERY in these days.

Follow the Evster on Twitter @TVMWW

Best of MLB: Twins pound out 21 hits, storm back to beat Orioles

Best of MLB: Twins pound out 21 hits, storm back to beat Orioles

BALTIMORE -- Max Kepler homered and drove in four runs, Miguel Sano and Jorge Polanco each had a career-high four hits and the Minnesota Twins roared back to beat the Baltimore Orioles 14-7 Monday night.

Minnesota trailed 5-0 in the second inning and 6-2 entering the fifth before cranking up the offense against Ubaldo Jimenez and an ineffective Baltimore bullpen.

A two-run double by Kepler helped the Twins knot the score in the fifth, Minnesota sent 11 batters to the plate in a six-run sixth and Sano added a two-run homer in the ninth.

Joe Mauer had three hits, two RBIs and scored twice for the Twins, who reached season highs in runs and hits (21).

Adam Jones hit a three-run drive in the second inning off Kyle Gibson (1-4) for Baltimore (see full recap).

Peacock, Astros 1-hit Tigers
HOUSTON -- Brad Peacock and three relievers combined for a one-hitter and Jose Altuve provided the offense with an RBI double to lead the Houston Astros to 1-0 win over the Detroit Tigers on Monday night.

Peacock was solid moving out of the bullpen to make a spot start for injured ace Dallas Keuchel. In his first start since September, Peacock allowed the lone hit and struck out eight in 4 1/3 innings. He was lifted after walking Tyler Collins with one out in the fifth inning.

Chris Devenski (3-2) took over and pitched 2 2/3 innings for the win before Will Harris pitched a scoreless eighth. Ken Giles struck out two in the ninth for his 12th save to allow the Astros to bounce back after being swept by the Indians over the weekend.

Detroit's only hit was a single by Mikie Mahtook with one out in the third on a night the Tigers tied a season high by striking out 14 times. The team's only baserunner after Collins was Victor Martinez, who was plunked with one out in the seventh. But Houston still faced the minimum in that inning when J.D. Martinez grounded into a double play to end the seventh.

The Astros struck early against Michael Fulmer (5-2) when George Springer drew a leadoff walk before scoring on the double by Altuve to make it 1-0 with one out in the first (see full recap).

Homers help Yankees top Royals
NEW YORK -- Didi Gregorius, Brett Gardner and Chris Carter homered, and the New York Yankees once again downed Jason Vargas by beating the Kansas City Royals 4-2 Monday night.

A reversed umpire's call in the seventh inning kept the Yankees ahead and enabled Michael Pineda (5-2) to top Vargas for the second time in a week. The Royals, with the worst record in the AL, have lost five of seven.

Vargas (5-3) began the day with a 2.03 ERA, tied for second-best in the majors. But the lefty fell to 0-7 lifetime against the Yankees when he was tagged by Gardner and Gregorius, the only left-handed hitters in the New York lineup (see full recap).

West Chester baseball wins Atlantic Regional, moves on to national championship tourney

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Photo credit: Ed Mailliard

West Chester baseball wins Atlantic Regional, moves on to national championship tourney

West Chester University baseball is moving on to the 2017 NCAA National Championships.

The Golden Rams won the Division II Atlantic Regional Final on Monday with a 12-7 decision over Winston-Salem State at Russell Diethrick Park.

Sophomore first baseman Jared Melone reached base six times, going 5 for 5 with a walk and four RBIs, while shortstop Nick Ward scored four runs and collected three hits to help West Chester capture its fourth regional title in program history.

Senior right-hander Josh McClain picked up the win in relief with three innings of one-run ball, as the Golden Rams scored five in the eighth inning to win their first regional crown since 2012, the year they won the national championship. 

West Chester is now 40-11 overall and will open national championship tournament play on Saturday at 3 p.m. against North Georgia in Grand Prairie, Texas.

For more details, see below.