The Evster's Super Duper Olympics Survey!

The Evster's Super Duper Olympics Survey!

ARE YOU READY FOR SOME MEATBALLS THE OLYMPICS?!

Seriously, how awesome are meatballs the Olympics?! Take this survey or just forget about it and go get some meatballs to see if you are a certified Winter Olympics SUPERFAN!

Ready?!

WHO CARES!

source: lhric.org

What are your thoughts on five-time Olympic gold medalist, Bonnie Blair?

a) Amazing athlete, seems like a genuinely nice person, one of the worst haircuts in the history of Western civilization.
b) Honestly, nothing about her matters besides that haircut.
c) I once knew this lady who was born without feet, and she had a nicer haircut than Bonnie Blizz.

Do you believe in miracles?

a) I believe Al Michaels is a dorf.
b) If Jared Leto wins an Oscar for Best Supporting Actor, then yes, I believe in miracles.
c) It was a miracle every time Bonnie Blair walked around in public with that haircut.

Two words: Jeremy Bloom

a) I legitimately thought he was going to become the next Vai Sikahema.
b) I had no idea that Vai Sikahema would become the next Greg Gumbel.
c) That's an insult to Greg Gumbel.

source: whocares.com

What is the most amazing thing about this picture of Alberto Tomba?

a) The lady in pink looking up longingly at Tomba la Bomba.
b) Tomba's la Bomba
c) The dude on the right rockin' a Channel 6 Action News hat?

Better ski jumper? Nøørven Glürgenbørgvs or Riklabst Bendtqkvøst?

a) C'mon, obviously Glürgenbørgvs!
b) Dude, are you kidding me? Bendtqkvøst!
c) I'm sorry, this is so stupid. Let's move on.

Who has had a better post-Olympic career, Apollo Ohno or this trash can? 

a) Well, let's see, Ohno was on Dancing With the Stars, and then he did Subway commercials, and now he's oh obviously it's the trash can.
b) That's honestly a pretty nice trash can.
c) First of all, that is not a nice trash can. It's all dented and it's full of garbage. Still way cooler than Apollo's stupid stupid STUPID soul patch.

Did you watch Johnny Weir's reality show? Be honest. 

a) yes

Whom do you prefer? Herschel Walker the football player or Herschel Walker the bobsledder?

a) Well, considering Herschel Walker was singlehandedly responsible for building the Cowboys dynasty, I've gotta go with Herschel the bobsledder.
b) I dunno, Herschel the football player had a pretty good career. And he had a decent run with the Eagles. He was gay, right?
c) I had an Uncle Herschel who loved corned beef and I am not making that up.

How amazing was the Jamaican bobsled team?

a) Dude, they crashed on every run. I loved them.
b) The AUDACITY of them to even sign up. Incredible.
c) I am sad to report that I have never seen the movie Cool Runnings. My life is meaningless.

Remember when Dan Jansen's sister died and then he slipped and fell and it was really sad?

a) And then he kept slipping and falling! Every single time! He seriously sucked.
b) Ugh, that look on his face when he was just sitting on the ice in disbelief? I couldn't handle it. I couldn't handle how he just kept embarrassing his country over and over and over again.
c) I'm sorry I really am.

source: DonPollackLookalikes.com

Favorite Winter Olympic athlete OF ALL TIME

a) Katarina Witt, no doubt. Her beauty, the way she looked, her physical characteristics, her appearance, how pretty she was, the way she bathed in a pool of flowers with her melon butt rising from the water omg you have to click this.
b) Eddie the Eagle, hands down the worst athlete to ever appear in any Olympic games. It's not even close. Those glasses!
c) Sidney Crosby lol

Are you prepared for Mary Carillo's human interest stories?

a) No.
b) Nope!
c) How many pants suits do you think she owns? 20? 30? I'd say 90.

Results: Congrattauulatastions! You just read the stupidest post in the 700 Level's history! Consider yourself a certified Olympics superfan. And a giant dorf.

Follow The Evster @TVMWW

Pete Mackanin on Odubel Herrera's slump: 'He needs to battle his way out'

Pete Mackanin on Odubel Herrera's slump: 'He needs to battle his way out'

After an 0-for-5 day at the plate, Odubel Herrera isn't heading to the bench a day later.

He's leading off. 

Pete Mackanin chose to move the slumping centerfielder atop the lineup card for Friday's series opener against the Reds despite Herrera's striking out in all five plate appearances Thursday.

"I think he's a .290-plus hitter as a leadoff man and I'm not going to sit him," Mackanin said pregame. "He needs to battle his way out. You figure you're the leadoff hitter once a game. After that, it's wide open."

While he hasn't batted leadoff this season, Herrera spent the majority of his time in that spot last season. In 76 games there, he batted .285 with a .359 OBP and .417 slugging percentage. 

The leadoff hitter this season has been Cesar Hernandez, who has a day off with a groin pull he's dealt with the last 10 days. Herrera primarily has been the No. 3 hitter this season and his average is down to .226 with 49 strikeouts to just 11 walks. 

Mackanin hopes the leadoff role can help change Herrera's approach at the plate.

"He was drawing a lot of walks at leadoff, so whether he has that mindset or not, I'm not sure," the manager said. "I just want to get him as many at-bats as possible. We need to get him going. We need him and [Maikel] Franco to get going."

May specifically has been tough on Herrera. He has four hits in his last 36 at-bats and has seven strikeouts in his last two games. He has just seven hits in 22 games this month. 

"I think he's at the point where he's grinding and sometimes when you grind, sometimes there's that feeling where you get lost," Mackanin said. "I've been in situations as a hitter where I've gone up to the plate saying, 'I don't care where it is. I'm going up there and just hacking.' Because you start thinking and that's not working.

"And you look for a pitch and then all of a sudden you say I'm going to take a pitch to get a look at and it's strike one. Then he throws you a nasty slider and that's strike two and your plan is out the window. So I've gone up to the plate myself saying, 'I'm just looking down the middle and swinging. I'm not thinking.'"

When asked, Mackanin said the team had not discussed demoting Herrera or Franco to the minors to take pressure off the duo.

While Herrera tries to hit his way back into a groove, Howie Kendrick is in the midst of working his way back to the majors. He was hit by pitch twice in a rehab appearance Thursday but is back in the lineup Friday in left field. 

Mackanin said Kendrick needed four days minimum in his rehab assignment and will therefore play Friday and Saturday before the team sees how he feels.

The manager also said the team would give more playing time to backup catcher Andrew Knapp. He started consecutive games for the first time on Tuesday and Wednesday. 

"I'm going to try and see him as much as possible and keep him as sharp as possible instead of once a week," Mackanin said. "That's tough to hit, once a week. It's tough to hit twice a week if you don't hit back-to-back. There's no ulterior motive."

Report: Brett Brown accuses longtime friend of defrauding him of $750,000

brett-brown.jpg

Report: Brett Brown accuses longtime friend of defrauding him of $750,000

Sixers head coach Brett Brown is in Australia this week, where he has accused longtime friend and former Australian men's national team assistant coach Shane Heal of defrauding him of $750,000, according to the Australian Associated Press.

Brown invested $250,000 into each of three companies for which Heal was the sole director. Brown wasn't given a legal title regarding the companies and didn't know the specifics of how the money would be used.

"I assumed that the money was going to be used for what Shane told me it was going to be used for," Brown said. "Because it was a friend that I had for 25 years."

Heal was charged last year by the Australian Securities and Investments Commission following an investigation relating to alleged misconduct in 2008, 2009 and 2010, according to the AAP.

The sides return to court in Brisbane on July 20.

Heal played in the NBA for the Minnesota Timberwolves in 1996-97 and was with the San Antonio Spurs in 2003.