Wake Me Up When the Eagles Sign Someone I've Heard Of

Wake Me Up When the Eagles Sign Someone I've Heard Of
March 19, 2013, 6:45 am

We Eagles fans had so much hope. Really, we did. Andy Reid is gone, and so are Joe Banner and Juan Castillo and Jim Washburn. We've got a new coach, who's installing new systems on offense and defense, and might even do something crazy like run the ball once in a while, or acquire at least one better-than-mediocre linebacker. Chip Kelly even showed up at Wing Bowl, showing he’s learned the important lesson that when it comes to sports success in this town, nothing is more crucial than getting on Angelo Cataldi's good side.
 
But since then? Nothing but bad.
 
First the Eagles saw it fit to hire both offensive and defensive coordinators away from the Cleveland Browns, who went 5-11 last year. Since the Eagles were 4-12, I guess I appreciate the commitment to incremental improvement, but still.
 
Then there was the inexplicable decision to bring back Michael Vick, a quarterback I don't think anyone in this town wants to see for one more game. Then they failed to trade Nick Foles to an obviously-interested Andy Reid in Kansas City, who got Alex Smith instead. Then they cut Mike Patterson, sending a clear message to every one of their players: If your brain explodes, and you work to come back, first we'll cut your pay, and then we'll release you.

That brings us to free agency. In the first week, the Eagles were active, signing Isaac Sopoaga, Bradley Fletcher, Patrick Chung, Jason Phillips, Kenny Phillips, Cary Williams and Connor Barwin. Then they traded for Arrelious Benn.

I think I speak for just about all Eagles fans when I ask, "WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?"

A lot of fans are excited about the free agent signings, but I don't really understand why. Did you know who any of these people were before last week? Don't they realize that the way to win in this league is to pinpoint the best players, and offering them so much money that they'll say yes?

This is a superstar league, and superstars win championships.

Why didn't the Eagles go after Joe Flacco, who just won the Super Bowl and is from South Jersey? What about Wes Welker, who's the definition of a scrappy, lunchpail Philly Guy who gets it? Why no trade for Percy Harvin, Anquan Boldin or Darrelle Revis?

I know what they're going to say: The Eagles spent money on the "Dream Team" in 2011, it didn't work, so now they're going to be cheap from here on in. Please. The problem with 2011 was that they signed the wrong guys, and they didn't spend enough. We’re shown once again that the Eagles are an organization that cares more about being Salary Cap Champions than real champions.

So now we come to the draft, and I've got a feeling Howie Roseman's once again going to do arrogant things like trading up, or trading down. That's what GMs do when they think they're smarter than everyone else.

That doesn’t sound like a “Gold Standard”  to you, does it?

Other Philly sports takes:

- Speaking of the draft, there was a fascinating exchange on the midday show Monday about quarterback Geno Smith. A caller said Smith "has McNabb written all over him," and that if the Eagles pick him at #4, we can expect a lot more heartbreaking playoff losses. Ike Reese, meanwhile, replied that Geno is better than McNabb right now. I know one of them is right, I'm just not sure which…

- Speaking of which, Bernard Hopkins' victory earlier this month just proves once again: Donovan McNabb was never a good quarterback.

- Don't tell me not to panic about Roy Halladay's spring struggles and coming out of a game after one inning! I don't want to hear that "he's going to be fine," because they said the same thing about Andrew Bynum.

- Still, that that World Baseball Classic brawl between Mexico and Canada was filled on both sides with Phillies minor leaguers gave me more hope for the Phils this year than anything else this spring.

- Considering how bad Tomas Perez was as a Phillies utility man, I have no idea why he'd be nominated to be Secretary of Labor.

- I'm mad at Jimmy Rollins for guest-starring on "The Cleveland Show." If he cared about this city, he'd go on "The Philadelphia Show."

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